I have a confession to make. I’ve always hated breathwork. Historically, if I have been in a yoga class and the teacher says “ok, let’s do some alternate nostril breathing,” I want to run away screaming. This technique as well as most others involving breathwork either give me anxiety or just make me feel like a failure because I just don’t get what the appeal is.
I’ve kind of always wondered why, what my aversion is, when the woo woo mindfulness world that I am a part of raves about this shit.
So last week when the opportunity to join a breathwork workshop at work arose, of course I avoided it. Even though I almost always attend workshops offered by this team at work, I figured I’d skip this one. I decided to sign up the morning of which I can only attribute my tendency to fill my schedule so that I can avoid doing actual work.
The workshop was hosted by JP Crimi. Almost immediately, he mentioned that he was a former Bostonian and that he didn’t buy into the woo woo shit.
Welcome Masshole! I’m open to what you have to say.
As he kept talking, I found myself being more open. Namely because he was authentic, real, and hilarious.
The instructions were to:
- lie on the floor – no pillow under your head, but covering with a blanket is allowed
- breathing is done through the mouth – a breath into your belly, then your chest, then an exhale – do not go too fast.
- we’d breathe for 7 songs with his guidance throughout
- there were also a number of ‘warnings‘ for what could happen during this
I was scared but remained open. As I engaged in this strange exercise, I started to notice that the chronic pain in my lower back was magnified. Eventually, I could feel the pain magnified throughout the whole right side of my body.
The music kept playing. He kept talking.
Fuck this guy…
Then, the 7 songs were over and we started the heart opening exercise. At first I felt relief that it was done, swearing I’d never do it again.
But then…
I remember 4 parts to the heart opening, but not exactly what they were. I also remember the pain in my back just disappearing – like it was gone. It remained gone for several hours after. Holy shit!
When given the opportunity to ask a question, I asked ‘is this in any way related to somatic therapy?’
He said ‘yes.’
I can’t ignore these messages. I must investigate.
